I’d rather be accused of giving a snub than being massive snob. Ten points to Jay Weatherill for voting #1 for family

How delightfully refreshing it is to hear that Premier Jay Weatherill has not dismantled his family holiday purely because a royal couple has decided to visit South Australia?

Presumably, he and wife Melissa Bailey had planned their overseas trip around school holidays, as would any other couple with their own family trips, and then in comes the exciting news that Prince William and the Duchess of Cambridge have locked in dates for an Aussie trip including a visit to South Australia.

And if Jay’s half the man I hope he might be, he’s probably received that news, by swinging back in his leather armed desk chair, face screwing up like a kid eating a brussel sprout and then spat out a quick four letter word that you won’t find in his next pubic speech.

Maybe he’s then called the wife to share the dilemma, hypothetically discussed the option of pulling the pin on the European trip and breaking the news to daughters Luci and Alice, and then…come to the conclusion that they can’t do that.  One of those moments in the career of a highly successful person where the decision becomes about a couple of things, your job, your ego and being a good mother or father.

Of course Liberal leader Steven Marshall has been quick to comment “Does Mr Weatherill think his absence amounts to a warm welcome and an appropriate way of welcoming the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge to Adelaide? This royal snub is a royal embarrassment to South Australia.”  Want to drop the word royal one more time Stevey?

The way I see it, it’s not just Jay that would have been mildly traumatised with the royal carrot being dangled all over their travel itinerary, spare a thought for poor Melissa, I mean, what wife of, is not going to be gagging to be part of the events that include a couple of well-loved royals plus an adorable, chubby cheeked future king in a pair of lederhosen’s?

Show me also a political wife that wouldn’t enjoy a bit of swanning around with the inner sanctum, dolled up for the world’s stage,  getting to know two of the most famous people in the world, and getting to show off  the home that they love?  And she gets to wear a hatA hat and it’s not even the races.

The mere thought of this type of gig could result in the entirety of Burnside to collectively combust, and poor Melissa is having to turn it down.

But then I guess though there’s always next year when Kate,   Wills and George will of course be back for their annual week on the beach at Normie?   Oh wait, no they won’t.  Jay and Melissa…queue the sombre music, will never be part of a royal tour again.

Steven Marshall’s harsh dig at the Premier reeks of something that goes hand in hand with a royal tour, successful, wealthy people turning into hard core sycophants. The total obsession with being part of something that has a social stature to it that compares to none other and everyone wants a piece of it.

I also agree with the spokesperson for the Premier who reminded Mr Marshall that the royals would not be coming here “for the purpose of meeting the Premier”.

No, with all due respect, they’re unlikely to know one thing, let alone the name of anyone in state politics in Australia.  Sure they’ll have advisors briefing them morning and night, but as for sitting around the Palace, with a map of Australia spread out on the royal rug, with William’s index finger ploughing down hard over South Australia, proclaiming royally “we must go there to see that lovely chap Jay Weatherill when we’re down under!”  I think not.

I think any man that puts his children and wife first when he’s made a commitment to them shows a great deal of character, and anyone that throws around the word snub is probably just a bit of a snob.

 

HOW MANY TIMES ARE WE GOING TO ASK 'CAN WOMEN HAVE IT ALL'?

Can women really have it all? How many times are females going to pose this to each other? And what does this question really mean anyway?

I get it’s essentially asking if we can have the career, the family and the partner? But beyond that, I’m at a loss.

What is it that these female editors and social commentators are really wanting to hear? ‘No, it’s not possible, I’m trying it but I admit I’ve bitten off more than I can chew?’

Or is it ‘Yes you absolutely can’, and therefore that’ll just instantaneously make it all rosy for the rest of the women out there trying to juggle the lot without stress or any guilt?

The fact is, there are a lot of women out there giving it their best by trying to satisfy the career part of them, the maternal part of them, and the romantic partner part of them. Are all parts working at all times? Probably not.

There are those that will say from the outside looking in that although these women have chosen to tackle having it all, a child may appear happy but could be a lot happier by having mum around more of the time. And that’s no doubt true too.

Most of my working mother friends will admit to having mother’s guilt about being away from the kids at certain times, and taking the financial reason for working out of the equation, they also admit that they need that stimulation and sense of self worth by continuing to work as well.

How many relationships simply aren’t the same once the kids come around, when you’re also trying to getting back into the work force after a certain period of time? What was just about the two of you and your respective careers is simply never going to be quite the same.

Whether or not you and your partner make it through the transition of just us, to the kids phase will depend on a lot of things, including your pre-existing emotional needs, and the level of care you place on protecting some part of the previous part of the two of you.

But for heavens sakes, the essence of what this question is about seems to me to be just so pointless.

At the end of the day, we’re all going to try and do what we feel we want to do in our hearts? We’re going to get down the track and arrive there with our partners or arrive on our own?

The children are going to grow up and either throw their upbringing in their parents faces claiming damage because mummy wasn’t always around. Or they’re going to grow up believing that mothers go to work and that’s just the way it is. No damage done. Who knows what you’ll get in the end?

But the thing is, I can’t help but suspect as can be a trait of some women, that although they appear to be supportive of each other by entering the debate, what they’re actually doing is judging them on how well they think the other is handling their lot.

I hate to say it but a lot of women can be by nature competitive and jealous of each other, which is usually because they are insecure about something to do with themselves.

It’s not constructive to keep going round and round in circles debating whether women can really have it all. Women are never going adopt the limiting lifestyle choices of decades ago. For some women they will decide to stay at home and direct their energies into their partners and raising the children.

Others are going divvy up their time and energy to fit in a career. Some parts of herself will suffer at times no matter whether she chooses option A or option B.

Can women really have it all is totally subjective. I look forward to when this little question finally goes out of fashion.

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON THIS QUESTION? WHAT IS HAVING IT ALL TO YOU? IS IT WORTH STILL COMPARING OURSELVES?