My column from The Advertiser last week….didn’t know whether to post in light of us losing Charlotte Dawson. This book below is an essential read for anyone doing it tough

 

There’s something disturbing and fascinating that happens to some people when they sense someone else is feeling good about themselves.  They want to drag them back to a level that makes them feel ok. A place that doesn’t highlight to them their own inadequacies.

Delta Goodrem is just the latest celebrity to admit she copped a barrage of hateful abuse via social media in the second series of The Voice. *And I’ve tragically add to add this mention post this column being printed in The Advertiser, Feb 20th, that now of course we’ve lost the really lovely Charlotte Dawson.

Back to Delta, I remember catching up with her in Sydney for a Sunday High Tea session during the first series of The Voice and it was clear that she was in a really good place.  She looked amazing, and had her usual bouncy confidence that is just all part of what makes her a blinding ray of light.

None of this being cut down by haters ever only applies to people in the spotlight, as everyone surely knows by now.  Beautiful kids at school and young people engaging in social media are victims of those that are ready and waiting on their ‘happiness watch’ and when they spot it, they’re going to shoot it right down.

There was a time in my own life where I went into some intense mental de-cluttering which had kept me in a constant state of insecurity and darkness, and after a period of time I started to feel like a much happier version of myself.  But there were even people who I loved who could sense something had changed and it made them feel really squirmy.

They started to kind of pick fights and act up which I believe was sub consciously about seeing if they could dim a little bit of my light so we were still on the same frequency.  Thankfully through the work I’d done I’d been warned how others around me might start to respond, so I made sure I made it clear that I was not interested in playing their games.

It took a bit of re-setting here and there until they knew there was nothing to fear and that they weren’t going to be tossed aside just because I had changed.

But what happens with anyone on social media is that when they appear in photos looking like they’re having their moment to shine, it flags them up to all those people that are sitting there in their dark energy doing nothing to make themselves feel good except go looking for somewhere to funnel their anger.

Every smile from a person like Delta, or just the nice kid at a local school is like kicking the hornet’s nest of those who have enormous self-hatred.

From extreme light there is nearly always extreme dark and social media is the greatest daily highlighter of this.  What I do wish was understood more is that if someone has a crack at you via your Face book, your twitter or whatever else you’ve put yourself on, then you block them.  Block them and report them.

You don’t try to reason with them, because they are not looking for reason. This isn’t a situation of miscommunication between two people, this is a case of someone you may or may not know, seeing something in you that they hate.  Because these people hate themselves. They’re trying to offload hate in the laziest of ways.

US talk show host Jimmy Fallon has been doing the most fabulous segment of late called MEAN TWEETS in which he gets celebrities like Cate Blanchett, George Clooney and half of Hollywood to read out the crap that gets tweeted about them.

Cate Blanchett reads out hers, @ventivodkacran Can people stop saying Cate Blanchett is beautiful?  Cate Blanchett is $%#$ing gross dude.

She then looks up at the camera, deadpan and responds… “Is that the best you can do?”  It’s a refreshing angle on a subject that has dominated our headlines so much lately.  The point is, no matter whether you’re the gorgeous teenager at the local school, or someone as famous as Cate Blanchett, these anonymous bastards are only as powerful as the power and airtime you give them.

6 thoughts on “My column from The Advertiser last week….didn’t know whether to post in light of us losing Charlotte Dawson. This book below is an essential read for anyone doing it tough

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