This is literally the Gay Mardi Gras for men celebrating their love of lycra. There they are everywhere, peddling their little hearts out in their favourite little pelotons.
Covered in their local sponsors, with a determination to get down King William Road, that would make the CEO of Cibo proud of money well spent.
As anyone that’s lived in Adelaide for some time would know, when you think coffee, you think ‘no mucking around’ cyclists.
They’re clustered in the little groups, discussing not sure what, but I can’t help but think, that they’re so in love with their little lycra world, that Jennifer Hawkins could walk in a pair of high heels and not much else, and they’d probably be none the wiser.
Their commitment to their peddling is unprecedented. As a mere mortal who would only dream of driving the chartered stretches that these blokes take on each week, I can’t help but wonder, when the lycra goes on, does one’s sense of humour, slightly change speed?
It’s quite simply; bromance at it’s finest.
They seem so ensconced with their cycling buddies, that I wonder if it’s hard for them to eventually make that lonely ride home?
After a few hours hanging with their sponsored buddies, do they struggle to finally break away from the pack?
I think it’s great that local business’s get behind them, and in front of them, and on their sleeves, and every other corner left of the lycra, because they know their brands will be whizzing around the streets of Adelaide, but what about the rest of us?
What about people like me, that covers the city, on foot, by bus, and by car to all sorts of locations as I go about my day? Why is it no one’s offered me a sponsorship to wear on my cap when I go walking? Or on my frock as I go shopping?
I go fast, and I cover ground.
I’m not having a go at the boys that are clearly the flavour of this month, but I have to say, I think it’s kind of funny.
I’ve had this conversation with girls all over town. So many of us wish me could program ourselves to find the lycra sexy. Maybe we’re just stroppy because these blokes aren’t the types to give us the love/hate experience of a wolf whistle?
Maybe we’re threatened that they’re doing something that brings them such joy, that we’re clearly not required?
Perhaps it’s even that we know that they’re purchasing our Daisy shavers to get smoother legs than many of us can maintain.
No offence boys, but waking up in the middle of the night to a prickly leg rubbing against you, triggers fears that we might have had too much to drink and ended up in bed with our best friend.
I do respect it makes you go faster and all that. And no doubt every second counts, when you’re riding Tour Down Under Every Weekender.
I completely admire that there’s no doubt some extra perks to being in your cluster around this time of year, because we all know that there’s groupies, for every sport that exists.
And there are also girls that will think you’re in the big race, especially if you can nail a German accent. Fair game I say.
Sneaking in the back entrance to the Hilton in your ‘get up’, and making your way through the lobby will no doubt, reek of ‘international rider in town for short time’.
Not everyone needs to be a Lance lookalike, cause how many others could we put a face to, unless we’re a real event junkie?
So in closing, I would like to say, boys this is your time! Make your local sponsors proud. You are putting Lycra on the map this week and for that, we salute you.
WHAT’S YOUR VERDICT? MEN IN LYCRA HOT OR NOT?