IS THERE ANYTHING MORE BORING THAN TALKING ABOUT GOLF?

People often ask me if my parents hassle me about getting married and having kids, to which I respond, ‘no they don’t, they hassle me about golf.’

I’ve had my more arguments, more pressure from both sides about when I’m going to take up the game of golf.

Talking about golf has become such a touchy subject, and for me at least, an intensely annoying and boring one at that.  So much so that I’ve had to work out a childish rebuttal in order to shut them up.

I simply start texting at the table, or wherever we happen to be. .  ‘Stop texting, it’s rude!’ they immediately shout.  So is ram raiding my head about a sport I don’t play, or is it just me?

The truth is, I don’t hate golf, and I wouldn’t mind learning to play one day.  I’m just terrified that if I play once, I’ll run around and start boring complete strangers about how I played.  I don’t want that for me, or them.

I do believe however, regardless of golf being in the news this week that it’s in real danger of fizzling out if it doesn’t lighten up and get with the rest of the world’s program.

Tiger Woods will probably never return to his former pre-pants -down glory, and I can’t help but think that if his sponsors and golf marketeers, hadn’t decided to be so up themselves and elitist his confidence and self esteem wouldn’t have been so destroyed, clearly affecting his game.

Sure his actions weren’t good for him, his family or for the sport, but there’s this unrealistic perfection attitude in the sport that goes right down to many of its clubs here in Australia.

According to my source within sports marketing, golf is on the decline sponsorship and media coverage wise, more than any other sport in the world.

As for Tiger, prior to his sex scandals,  were said to be well aware of his extra curricular activities for a long time but kept their mouths shut, not out of loyalty to Tiger, but because the sport needed him in so many ways.

But the game that still operates some of the stuffiest clubs in Australia, still had and still do have, operate as if they’re living in the 1950’s.

Quite simply, they persist in marketing golf as if it was some sort of untouchable, asexual, elitist game at the top end, which is a ludicrously hard gig to live up to.  And who does that relate to anyway?

Back in 2009 when Tiger’s mistresses started falling out of the trees like rotten apples, my mother’s golf club was hosting the then Australian Masters in which Tiger was playing in.

The club members were beside themselves, full chest clutching style anticipating his arrival. They even named a Club Sandwich after him.  And then it all went horribly wrong.

Not just for Tiger.  Not just for mum’s club. Its members were so appalled in the Tiger scandal that they promptly took the Club Sandwich off their menu.

Now, surely this slightly reeks of someone needing to get a sense of humour?  No it was not an endearing story that was starting to break out, but for heavens sakes, he was still the best golfer in the world and he was playing on their course.

Many of those high up in golfing circles, either at club or event level would argue that there needs to be discipline, needs to be etiquette, but if you put the industry or an individual so high on a pedestal it is a long way to fall.

I never thought I’d say it but it wouldn’t hurt the golf gods to consider that sex actually does sell.  It doesn’t mean I’m suggesting that Adam Scott do a shirt off calendar shoot, nor should we hope for another sex scandal, but I do think that more people might take an interest in playing and watching golf if it didn’t protect it’s image quite so much.

IS THERE ANYTHING MORE BORING THAN TALKING ABOUT GOLF? PLEASE TELL ME SO I CAN RAISE IT AT MY FAMILY DINNERS….

7 thoughts on “IS THERE ANYTHING MORE BORING THAN TALKING ABOUT GOLF?

  1. THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jenny I will most certainly check those out. It is funny though what reaction the conversation of golf draws out of people. I’ve had some fantastic and funny comments already today about the column. I’m sure not all golf people are boring, I just landed in the family that suggests many are. ha ha. They don’t yet know I’ve written the article. I’m going to pick my moment to read it out. Oh, actually, of course I’ll whip it out next time they start talking about golf. Now that will be fun.

    Thanks Jenny
    All the best
    x

    On Wed, Apr 11, 2012 at 1:23 PM, Jenny Williams wrote:
    From: Jenny Williams

    Subject: Golf

    Message Body:
    Hi Amber,
    I’m a psych who works with elite sportspeople and associations including golfers. I enjoyed your column today but suggest you check out Bubba Watson or Ben Crane on youtube. I was told by an old golfer that using them as good examples by working hard and having fun was pointless as they had never won a major. To see Watson win the green jacket on Sunday was a joy… Check out “Oh Oh Oh” and you may join me in believing that not everyone who is great at golf is boring. Enjoy your columns and would have a healthy debate sometimes but love we have some women with a voice in the community. Keep up the good work
    Jenny
    http://www.bestongroundperformance.com

    • Bec Boulton, Kym O’Brien and 9 others like this.

      Brad Corrie They might think if u play golf u will find a BF 🙂
      12 hours ago · Like · 1

      Deanna Daradan Omg that is so hilarious! My dad has been on my back about going to play golf with him! Hahaha!
      12 hours ago · Like

      Darren Leckie No Golf, your Grand Mother would be horrified
      12 hours ago · Unlike · 1

      Gabrielle Badcock Maybe they aren’t pressuring you about the BF because they think you might bat for the other team… he he he!!
      12 hours ago · Unlike · 1
      Amber Petty Ok, Darren, no I have a feel Nan would be disappointed that I don’t……….and Gabrielle, yes you may be right!!!!!!!
      12 hours ago · Like

      Darren Leckie When I think Golf, I always think of Harriet
      12 hours ago · Like
      Amber Petty But the great thing about Nan was that she didn’t earbash me about it. She was the best.x
      12 hours ago · Like · 1

      Karin Illingworth No
      12 hours ago · Like

      Darren Leckie So So True!!
      12 hours ago · Like

      Nancy Timpano Haha this is hilarious!!
      12 hours ago · Like

      Richard Missingham You should be playing golf .. What do you hit off ???
      12 hours ago · Like

      Richard Missingham Boyfriends are over rated !!!!
      12 hours ago · Like

      Richard Missingham Blogg was a good read and very funny.. I’m a golfer but only very social ..
      One of the reasons I don’t play more is because serious golfers or that .. Serious .. I tend to take the piss out of them and they don’t like that ….
      My advice .. Take it up .. In one of your short skirts and put the sex back into golf .. Lol
      12 hours ago · Like

      Louise Zacharia LOL, if that is all your folks hassle you about, then be thankful, could be worse 🙂 !! Hey, but seriously, lotsa rich and handsome men play golf too, sweet girl… I say grab the golf sticks and give it a bash 🙂
      12 hours ago · Like

      Nikki Blackwood My mum has been trying to get me to play golf for years. No luck as yet……
      12 hours ago · Unlike · 1

      Ashleigh Hanley I think you would make a better golfer
      12 hours ago · Like

      Joseph Buccheri Ambs, you were always one of the hardest to score- Brighton back 9 any day- but obviously not quite the frustration of fun trying…x
      11 hours ago · Like

      Stephen Haggett i’ll be your boyfriend !
      9 hours ago · Unlike · 1

      Karen-lee Goody love it!
      7 hours ago · Like
      Amber Petty I love that i’ve had an ex comment here that I’d make a better golfer…..no doubt, accurate. 🙂
      3 seconds ago · Like

      • Simone Heydon and 5 others like this.

        Chris Thompson yer talking to other people about other people talking about golf
        13 hours ago · Like

        Melanie Sculfer Yes, playing it!
        13 hours ago · Like

        Saeble Lyghter yes. talking about articles which talk about golf.. 😛
        13 hours ago · Like · 2

        Sean Batson yes talking about cricket, football or Golf. Hence the reason I no longer listen to MMM.
        13 hours ago · Like

        Jason ‘Serg’ Golding Chris and Saeble have got it in one.
        13 hours ago · Like

        Lisa O’Malley playing it lol
        12 hours ago · Like · 1

        KimJohn Neate What is world wide popular sport with 4 letters and starts with a T ?? Golf…..a riddle my golf loving husband thought he’d get me with,but I got it easy,because he talks about it so much,I now am keen to play myself see what the big deal is 😉
        12 hours ago · Like

        Peter Mielnik I love my sport, but seriously – GOLF? It’s like yachting, they all have to much money.
        12 hours ago · Like

        Jason ‘Serg’ Golding The only good golf is a VW.
        12 hours ago · Like

        Dennis Sharland Baseball on Valium,
        12 hours ago · Like

        Jane Alcorn I don’t play any sport. I have enough to keep me busy in the real world.
        12 hours ago · Like

        Eddie Lapko Amber i love your articles in the paper and read them religiously BUT i think golf is the best game in the world……i love it…these knockers on here and maybe yourself “maybe” have never actually been out on a golf course…but i tell ya once you get biiten by the golf bug YOU STAY BITTEN……:)
        12 hours ago · Like

        Shane Soutter watching people play it
        12 hours ago · Like

        Natalie Folker Yeh tennis, it’s like watching grass grow… Yawn. 😮
        10 hours ago · Like

        Melanie Sheppard Love it
        9 hours ago · Like

  2. LOL, if that is all your folks hassle you about, then be thankful, it could be worse, I guess 🙂 !! Hey, but seriously, lotsa rich and handsome men play golf too, sweet girl… I say grab the golf sticks and give it a bash 🙂

    • This is very true!!! I know I’d probably love it and YES there’s probably gorgeous meb strolling around all over the course but if my parents would just stop going on
      and on about it I might get there. My mother hates to be told what to do so age just talks about it now on purpose…. X

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