The last week has seen the rise and fall of the cougar through two fascinating ladies living two rather fascinating lives.

Although I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, the word ‘cougar’ really is such an unattractive term, although for the sake of this column it probably works because being an older woman with a younger man doesn’t always end pretty.

Firstly I’d like to celebrate the woman with more titles than any other royal in the world, shortened to avoid arthritis,  to the Duchess of Alba.

The fabulously flamboyant 85 year old, worth a squillion,  who’s just flamenco-ed her way down the aisle with her third husband who is a casual 25 years her junior.

Now say what you like, but as far as I’m concerned, as long as this eccentric grandmother has sorted herself a prenuptial agreement as tight as reef knot, if she gets a decade or so from a man that shows her some love and fun, then I’ll cheers to that.

On the other side of cougar town is Demi Moore in what seems to be a classic case of two hot people from different tick boxes getting to the nasty end of a relationship that was always possibly a worry.  And a worry to them both I don’t doubt for different reasons.  Reasons far more anxiety laden for Demi being the older of the two.

Now I’m not saying by any means that a large age difference can’t work, but there are some serious stresses that go with it, and when the woman is the elder, and one who has lived her life in a world that focuses heavily on youth and beauty, it was never going to be a walk in the park.

I hoped like crazy that Demi, the Queen of the Brat Pack could pull this off where few other woman have succeeded before.   Let’s face it, in her own right, she’s no doubt been the fantasy of more young men with a thing for older women than just goofy old Ashton.

It was a nail biting public affair as it was playing out when Demi started publicly tweeting photos of herself decked out in a bikini live from her bathroom.  It seemed maybe that just her younger boyfriend seeing she’s still got the goods wasn’t enough to chill her out.

There was a message being sent to the world that she wanted them to get.  ‘I may be 48 but chew on this sisters!’

And the twitter picture fairytale continued. Photos of the two f them in bed, peaking out from the covers like a couple of teenagers reaffirmed the youthfulness of the relationship they so wanted to have.

How does one even as hot as Demi, truly stay centred in herself and not over think the hands of time creeping up, living inside a world full of shallow Hollywood piranhas?

And sure if rumours are true that Ashton’s been hot tubbing it all over town with young trashies, then perhaps he was always like that and just a greater actor than we thought?

Or maybe, and disappointingly, the attraction for a younger man in terms of what being with an older woman can be about, started to fall away and be replaced with swag of insecurities that no longer seemed so appealing?

Demi’s most recent tweeted picture of herself since rumours of Ashton’s infidelity came out, is one of her alone in a bed, pretending to be asleep.  She looks sad and for the first time, seemingly resigned to her age.  Hundreds of comments accompany it by fans or those intrigued by her life.  It felt and read much like an obituary.

One can only hope that she can regroup and start to look forward for herself, realise how beautiful she is, and the catch that she is, rather than seemingly trying to manifest her life in the reverse.

The saying, ‘you’re only as young as the person you’re sleeping with’, is all well and good, but it’s the waking up that’s not always that great.



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